People with disabilities, young, old and in between, all want the same thing: to feel included. A sense of belonging and integration is vital for all people around the world, especially those with disabilities. When that sense of belonging in life is missing, it can be very easy to fall into a dark hole and convince yourself that it doesn’t matter. Well, we all matter; no matter our age, gender or disability.
Society has ingrained into our brains that if we are different, we don’t belong. Society rejects the different; they don’t fit the perfect “mold,” so to speak. An estimated 48.9 million people in the United States have some type of disability. There are almost 50 million people who deserve to be treated with the same love and support as the rest. Here are 6 ways you can support people with disabilities:
1) Set high and reasonable expectations
Society wants us to believe that people with disabilities need to be continually pampered and require constant supervision. While all disabilities are different, that is generally not the case. Society continues to set low expectations for people with disabilities, and over time, that way of thinking has been embraced by a large majority of people. This transcends to people with disabilities as well, and they begin to set low expectations for themselves as well. One of the best ways to support people with disabilities is to set high but normal expectations. Make them feel like your equal.
2) Find out
It’s as easy as completing a Google search! You don’t need to take classes or go to the library; all you have to do is type a few words into Google and thousands of articles are at your fingertips. You don’t need to be an expert, just know the basics. Learn a little about the good, the bad, and the ugly of someone with a specific disability.
If you feel comfortable, ask them in person. The internet can only tell you so much. Each disability is unique to you, so if you feel the time is right, ask them if they feel comfortable enough to talk about their disability. Ask them what they can and/or cannot do and what they would like to be able to do in the future.
3) Never assume
You know what they say about taking things on. If you feel it’s appropriate to ask if someone has a disability, do so, but don’t assume you know. Many disabilities go unnoticed because they can easily fit into the “mold” of society. There is nothing more uncomfortable than assuming that someone has a disability and actually does not.
4) Be a good listener
This could apply to all stages of life, but being a good listener is vital to supporting people with disabilities. People with disabilities are often assumed to be unable or unwilling to interact with others, but this is not always the case (and usually is not). You may need to learn how they communicate and adapt from there, but listening is a very important trait and quality. When you really open up and listen to the other person, they will start to feel included and they will start to feel important; start to feel loved. These three things are vitally important to live a happy life.
5) Be inclusive and welcoming
Although this is related to the previous point, it is important to keep it in mind. You don’t have to be friends with everyone and go out of your way to spend time with them. Being inclusive should not be associated with pity. We are not forcing anyone to become friends, but please make sure your friends and acquaintances with disabilities can participate in group activities. If you don’t know if they can do it or not, ask them! Just asking questions can make them feel included.
6) Be a good support system
Everyone can thrive when they have a good support system to fall back on. People with disabilities may need support differently than you do, but they need the act of support nonetheless. Educate yourself and understand how you can be a strong support system. A good support system looks different for people with different disabilities.