These 5 Valentine’s Day Dating Mistakes Could Stifle Romance and Land You in the Dog House. They include 1) assuming that a romantic Valentine’s Day is all about sex, 2) forgetting the principle that even meatloaf looks special by candlelight, and 3) being stingy just because you’re on a budget. You can discover how to squeeze more romance out of Valentine’s Day or any date.
1. Assuming that a romantic Valentine’s Day is about sex.
Mistaken. It’s not all sex (although it could be). It’s about romance.
Years ago, advice columnist Ann Landers asked her readers, “Would you rather snuggle or have sex?” Of the 90,000 women who responded, 72% preferred cuddling. Mind you, this is not a scientific survey, but it is revealing. If you’re making all your plans just so you can get your sweetie into bed, then slow down, mate. Instead, make your Valentine’s Day date all about pleasing your love. Consider the 5 senses: sight, hearing, smell, touch, and taste. How can you appeal to each? You might go crazy, er, lucky, but you’re sure to score points with it.
2. Forgetting the principle that even meatloaf looks special by candlelight.
Presentation matters. That means the way you give the gift counts as much as the gift itself. So be creative. Present your Valentine’s gift idea in a special or unusual way. Did you buy concert tickets? Good choice. Now make earrings out of them. Gift wrap them in a box, instead of sticking them inside a card. If you’re the king of sloppy wrappers, have your friend do it. Or check out the basket store for ideas. Every year I gave my stepfather a tie for Christmas. The year I had the tie canned, I was puzzled and delighted.
3. Being stingy just because you have a limited budget.
Think about what he likes. Whether it’s penguins or shopping, is there a movie on that subject? Affordable accessories? Start with an idea or theme and ask yourself, how do you use this? What could go with that? For example, do you love romance novels or historical fiction? Go to the thrift store or Goodwill or Salvation Army and buy them a box of books. Make a bookmark with a musky note on the back. Wrap each book separately to prolong your delight as you discover each title. Get him a book lamp and a Snuggie blanket.
Your most thoughtful Valentine’s gift could be free. Has she wanted you to clean out the closet or the garage? Then do it! And remembering that presentation is important, put a big red bow on the door. Would you like a weekend to herself? Then give him a coupon promising to take the kids camping. Or camp out at your brother’s house while she has a sleepover with her friends.
4. Making the same old small talk.
It is a special day. So get to know her better. No matter how long they’ve known each other, they’ll uncover hidden stories. You will find hundreds of conversation questions online.. Here are some good conversation questions you can use right away:
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How did you survive high school?
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How were your friends?
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What clubs or teams did you belong to?
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How did you manage to spend money?
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How have you changed since then?
5. Put a lot of attention on the special date and then go back to normal life.
It’s like being thrown off a feather mattress and landing hard on the ground. Keep the romantic fires burning, at least for a few more days.