It is typical at this time of year to prepare a list of resolutions for the coming year. I think this goes back to the Garden of Eden when Adam said to Eve, “I think I’ll turn the page this year.” And so the tradition has come down to us today.
Typically, people will make a list of all the things they will give up in the coming year. All kinds of bad habits find their place on the list, including smoking, drinking, and other nefarious activities. Of course, no one really plans to keep their New Year’s resolutions, but writing them down on a piece of paper seems to give people a sense of accomplishment.
One of the big things on the resolution list has to do with diet and weight loss over the next year. I’ve often wondered why this seems to be number one on most New Year’s resolution lists. Even Yours Truly has succumbed in years past to attend this resolution on its list.
This year I found out why it’s so high on people’s list. It starts with Halloween and all the sweets that are consumed. Now, there is a purpose behind all of this. And it’s only recently that I’ve put it all together. And to my loyal fans of reading (both) I would like to share with you the wisdom of my muse.
The reason you start with Halloween candy is that candy is candy. This sweet serves to set the pump, so to speak, for the eating frenzy that is about to begin. About 3 weeks after the Halloween candy explosion, Thanksgiving arrives.
When our ancestors made a Thanksgiving dinner, they had to chase down the turkey and kill it themselves. The turkey then had to be plucked, cleaned, stuffed and ready to roast. All of this activity burned off all the calories from the Halloween candy frenzy.
Now, all we do is put it in an oven and the biggest activity we have is bending our elbows to see how fast we can get the turkey from the plate to our mouth. Although this activity is quite strenuous, you don’t actually burn calories in the process.
If it was just the turkey it wouldn’t be so bad, but no one can eat turkey without all the accoutrements. Roast turkey without a generous helping of pumpkin pie is the closest thing to profanity I’ve come across.
As soon as Thanksgiving dinner settles in our stomachs, it’s Christmas and all the holidays associated with Christmas. No one can refuse a Christmas party with all the delicacies that have been prepared with so much care. When I go to a party, I think it’s quite rude not to enjoy the party snacks.
I like to join organizations around October and keep an eye out for the annual Christmas party. Shortly after the New Year, I left that organization. Call me lazy if you want, but in my opinion, the Christmas party is worth the subterfuge.
Then there is the wonderful family Christmas dinner. Need I say more?
So we come to New Year’s Eve. By then everyone has eaten so much that hardly anyone can take another bite. Not only that, but many people feel guilty about eating so much during the holiday season. Others, like me, are made to feel guilty for eating so much during the holiday season.
To deal with this guilt, many people make a New Year’s resolution to go on a diet for the next year.
Many years ago, at this time of year, I made a drastic tactical error. It had been a particularly good festive season with lots of Christmas parties and dinners. Feeling quite expansive at the time, I sighed deeply and said, “After eating so much, I should go on a diet.”
Quick as a wink, the kind lady of the parsonage took that as a sign and replied, “I think that’s an excellent idea. That will be your New Year’s resolution for next year.”
So it was.
I quickly learned that such resolutions come with a lot of superfluous oversight. Every time I turned around, my wife would say, “How’s your diet going?” Of course, she knows exactly how she’s coming from because she’s the one who was overseeing this aspect of my life.
When I went out to eat at a restaurant, it helped me a lot to monitor my orders by observing, “You can’t order that because it’s not in your diet.”
There are many things that won’t be on my New Year’s resolution list and the number one item that won’t be there is diet. Phrases like: “Wow, I ate too much tonight” disappeared from my vocabulary. Or, “After eating like this I must go on a diet.”
I’m not sure that God is as concerned about my eating habits as other people are. I like what David writes in Psalm 23. “You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil, my cup overflows” (Psalms 23:5).
When God sets the table, he expects me to feast and I don’t anticipate disappointing him.