The problem most guys have when they meet a girl is that they continue to show too much interest too quickly. This is for asking too many questions or giving too many compliments. Women don’t want their boyfriends to adore them, they want a balance between being challenged and being understandable. Being adored isn’t exactly on every woman’s agenda list for the boy of her dreams. The best way to be nice is to go on without seeming creepy.
Here are 6 signs that you are showing too much interest:
1. You ask her what her name is too soon.
The quickest way to scare a girl is to ask her name early on. Why should I give you her name? Have you done anything to deserve her name, or any information about her? Would you also like her address and social security number? You shouldn’t ask for things without a reason behind it. The reason you should ask someone’s name is because you enjoy talking to each other, not because you enjoy not talking to each other, or simply because the world has them standing next to each other.
2. Stop asking questions and start guessing.
To prevent your conversation from turning into a shy interview, you should playfully guess things instead of just asking about them. All the time people ask general questions that you would find on a job application. How old are you? What do you do for fun? Do you have any Hobbie? What did you major in college? When you turn these questions into guessing games, you keep things fun and exciting, instead of nervously escalating to the next question. I assume you work in advertising, sounds much more interesting than, insert answer here.
3. Talk in stories.
If you’re constantly asking questions and trying to fill in the blanks, you’re not having a conversation or learning anything from each other. You’re basically moving through the bullet points in a list. By sharing genuine stories that complement your conversation, the person you’re talking to can gain background information about the type of person you are, leading to comfort. A story can last forever, a question can take a minute or two. Make sure your stories are engaging. Your story about your cat is just boring.
4. Too much information.
Most people don’t realize that strangers aren’t exactly their friends. There is such a thing as too much information. Refrain from talking about your family problems, your friend problems, your ex problems, your problems all together. Don’t talk about icky moments with your girlfriends, don’t ask her about her tastes in men. At some point they are allowed to talk about these things in the future, but not before the names are known.
5. Don’t ask for her number unless there is a reason to do so.
Flirting is not a race for numbers. What is the urgency? Is there another girl at the bar you want to talk to too? Quality over quantity. Unless there is some urgency, someone should not be inclined to feel that they should not be able to get more information. After a certain point, if neither of you show signs of leaving, tell her that she might want to leave soon and that she’s enjoying the conversation she’s having, but just in case, would she be willing to talk again?
6. Don’t act like you can stay forever.
You don’t want to give off the idea that you don’t have a life, or that you have nothing better to do than talk to the hundreds of random strangers in the world. Also, people have to eat. If you have their contact information, you can go, no problem. Even better, you could ask the woman you’re talking to to escort you to your next destination, whether it’s a bar, a bite to eat, or a walk in a park. If you met in the middle of the street, you don’t want to be standing in the cold for hours on end talking to each other. It’s just common sense.